motivating and encouraging wives and moms
I think our husbands are going to make mistakes...they're human, right? The mistake we wives make is taking over when we believe they are going to make a mistake. It's their job to lead and our job to follow and they're both tough jobs.
Hello, I'm new to your blog. I don't remember how I found it now, but I have been reading for a little while now and REALLY love it!! I am a home schooling mom of four. Anyway,do you think we shouldn't advise them even if we think they are making a mistake??? Just curious because I battle with this issue. I want to allow my husband to lead, BUT it is so hard to sit back and watch when I feel like I could jump in and help. I really try to do this in a respectful way.
Ooooo...your gonna make us think now. Can we go back to talking about fajitas?;)This is hard, but I have learned that when I step aside and allow him to be the leader and desision maker he is called to be, it frees him up to hear God without distractions. Obviously we discuss and he knows my feelings, but I really try (try) to let him know that he is ultimately in charge and I will support his choices. I found it brings peace and that he is a great leader even if I'm not coaching him (gasp).;) I kinda learned this the hard way.
i totally agree w/ Deleise. In the end, God honors our willingness to get out of his way. ...I think I may need to make a quick phone call...
Reminds me of the concept that "the customer is always right", which I happen to LOVE. Hmm...I'll get back to you on this one...I'm a 'fixer' and a 'leader' by nature, but I also don't have a husband to follow yet, so we'll have to wait and see. :)
I love this!!!!!!! The true is Tim is always right=) I just think I am...
I've been hearing a lot about submission lately...pretty sure God is trying to tell me something! Wish I could just do it:) Brandon is an excellent man of God and a great leader- I don't know why I try to lead when he is FULLY capable.
We have such a mother's heart - which is awesome for our kids . . . not our husbands. The NLT version of Genesis 3:16b says, "And you will desire to control your husband, but he will rule over you." This desire to control is a curse that we have to daily make the choice not to follow through with. Thank goodness my husband is very respectful in finding out my opinion of things. I don't know how I would handle a dictator-type.
Working on this one. Difficult, but so important in a marriage based on Biblical standards. Works so much better when we let him lead. Very hard for us "leader" personalities.....esp because Scott is gone 24 hours at a time for work, which requires a variation of leadership on my part while he's gone, but time to hand over the role again when he gets home. That's where I have a hard time. Thanks for the difficult topic. Good to ponder these things!
Yes, I agree. We're able to talk through so much that it usually is a right together or a wrong together. JT's pretty awesome, so if I disagree and need to talk, he's really willing to listen and change if necessary. We have a pretty great relationship. I try very hard to uplift him and encourage him as the leader. He has really risen to the occasion.
I hope you don't mind a man's point of view on this, but I will give it anyway.Please remember that most men see the big picture and don't pay much attention to the details. that is where the wife make us strong. We can lead the way but without you guys the plan would fall apart. We need you more than you need us, plane and simple. I hope your commentors read this and know that the man can't do it without a wife willing to tackle the details.
For me, from a man's perspective, I think it depends. Men tend to(but not always) take more risks as they lead than our better halves. These "risky decisions" may play right into a woman's insecurity, thereby making it appear to her to be a "wrong" decision. However, with that said, I would hope that all men would communicate effectively with their wives and be open to listen to the wisdom only they can provide, as Roger said above.
Never ask a LONG-winded girl for "thoughts"Man, we were just talking about this today... women have a way of controlling husbands without controlling - like controlling emotions - sex - etc., we can use our beauty/sexuality to influence men, kingdoms and nations (in a Jezabelle kind of way). Or...we can choose to see the triggers where we are tempted to control our men indirectly and STOP! For example, we can talk them into things - I think. I can put up a good argument with my hubby! But...he may not know - is my argument from a "fear of change"; from Pride; from a desire to have things my way. My husband is ALWAYS right - even if I don't like it. I don't want to end up someone because I am directing our steps - I want to end up where GOD wants us! Great thoughts!
Great comments and thoughts. Stretched us a little bit, huh? and thanks to you men and new commenters (is that a word?) for speaking up as well. Erin brings up a point I'll elaborate on in a later post.
Kyle- you are messing up the flow... LOLI am forwarding this to my wife minus my buddy Kyle's comment. :-)Thanks for your constant encouragement.
Oh good! Mama Meadows posted on this, and Scott Williams commented! And other people who's respect I admire as well. (grin) Mrs. Meadows, this is why I've been first reluctant, and then very careful, about commenting on your blog. My opinions don't always follow the "flow". And by "don't always" I mean hardly ever. (grin) So, I'm going to start by stating that I have seen three of you local alien women bring up this issue recently, and I have almost literally bitten my tongue off holding back my "slightly different" opinion, and by opinion there, I mean rant(grin). I've been editing this particular post topic for some time now, and usually wind up going "nah". But I like the number three, and usually at this point I would just say, "oh well, they're aliens, they can take it." The reason I'm still hesitating is that while two of the three female alien statements are by you and Cindy Beall, experienced, married, alien bloggers, I'm more cautious about how I treat younger alien bloggers that fall into the 18-30 year old age. Especially without partner backup. You two have been around the block enough to know that despite my age, I'm not yer "elder", whatever y'all mean by that. I'm very cautious about the possibility of pushing that button with younger aliens. At least, I hope I am. And also because the third one who made a statement about this recently is Anna. So I'll finish by stating that I'm asking your opinion before I post a response to this topic on my blog, linking the statements on your three blogs. What do you think, Mama Meadows?
Go for it Jimmy. I'm woman enough to handle it! Just hope I can understand it. (grin) Just watch out for Q---he even has dominion over the aliens.
It is a hard thing to do to let him lead even when he leads in the wrong directions at times...I think it is more important to let him lead even if he is wrong than to take the reigns...God honors our submissive heart posture...and letting him lead no matter what buuilds a deeper intimacy instead of bitterness.
Robin, I need to talk to my pastor before I go with this one. She might be able to give me some much needed insight on the topic.(grin)
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