Sunday, April 19, 2009

God, You Know

Last Thursday, Erin came over to show me her rash.  "Mom, I think I have chicken pox."

Now, that's not a normal thing to hear from your 30-year-old child.  Even if she is the oldest of our seven children AND NONE OF THEM EVER HAD CHICKEN POX!

Yes, they all were exposed plenty of times.  And when the immunization came out later in the 1990's, the three youngest had the immunization.

Here's the hard part....Erin is 12-13 weeks pregnant.  She gets her blood results back today telling us for sure whether or not she has chicken pox.  Her doctor was honest and clinical about the risks to the baby from the virus.  And Web MD isn't favorable at all.

It has my mother-heart wondering, why now?

But, Erin shared with me yesterday that she took a long walk and cried and prayed.  The only prayer she could pray was "God, You know,  You know."

 And she rests in that. 

 Her hope and faith is not in what the doctor says or doesn't say, and it certainly isn't in Web MD.

 Her hope is in God alone.  He knows.

 Whatever you are facing, no matter what anyone says.....God knows.  Take a lesson from Erin's faith today......I am.  ~Robin



She sent me this post this evening:



You know those times when you are going through something super hard and you just don't know what to do?  Your mind won't settle down, you know you should be in the Word and praying like crazy, but frankly you can hardly make yourself function.  What do you do at times like this?

I had moments like this over the weekend as I was faced with hard and bizarre circumstances.  I kept thinking where's that book that tells me step-by-step how to act and what to do when you possibly have the chicken pox (at 30 years old, pregnant with my third child, of all things), and the chance that my unborn child may come into this world scarred, handicapped, or with mental retardation.  Where in the heck am I supposed to get answers?

Well, for me, when my mind won't settle down I need to get my endorphins going and this means some sort of exercise for me.  I went on a 4-mile power/prayer walk and even though I tried hard to pray, about all I could get to was, "God . . . you know."  And really I kept repeating that phrase over and over for the 45 minutes that I walked.

I came home and sat down with my Bible and just chose a Proverb.  I really wasn't getting anything out of it until I read Proverbs 16:20b "Things work out when you trust in God". (The Message)  I closed my Bible.  That is all I need to know.  I prayed that God would keep that verse in my head all day, and He did.

He was able to calm my mind by me just praying, "God . . . you know."  And He would answer, "Things work out when you trust in Me."  And that's all I needed.  I truly believe this.

What do you do when things seem out of control?

Erin

14 comments:

Elizabeth said...

I've been in prayer for you, Erin, since I saw your status on facebook the other day. I cannot imagine the emotions you've been facing!

Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us!

P.S. I LOVE The Message Bible!!!

deleise said...

That was such a powerful post. It brought tears to my eyes. Love you both. Still in prayer...

Gina said...

I am over here in tears. I am going through a trial right now. He knows, He knows. Sometimes I forget that He knows. Thank you for the reminder!

Theresa said...

Praying Praying Praying and Still Praying!!

Your family has been on my mind all weekend! Love you all!

David Copeland said...

Starting my Monday praying for you!

Cindy Beall said...

Powerful. Tears appeared in my eyes but I stopped them. For heaven's sake, I put on make-up today.

God, You know. Does a prayer get any more beautiful than that?

I think not.

Michael said...

Yes...we have been praying for you, Erin. Thanks for sharing with us during such an emotional time. Keep us updated!

Renae said...

I am praying for you, Erin. You have been on my heart since your first mention of the chickenpox. Praise God for the anchor in the storm. You have many friends praying. There is no medicine more powerful. ALL THINGS work together for the good of those who love God, even when we are blinded by the bad of the moment. May God's peace surround you and your family.

Kelsey said...

Thanks for sharing your heart and the truth...God knows. Such peace in that. Praying for you!

Katrina said...

You are being prayed for on our end as well. Your prayer and my prayer have been exactly the same lately... I haven't known anything else to pray lately so my mantra has been "God You are Sovereign."

Abbi said...

I would love to NOT cry at work...just once.

I know those moments...when all you can utter are a few desperate words. Personally, I think God uses those prayers for our good even more than the ones where we try to explain our situation to Him...like He doesn't know already!!

I'm praying my guts out for you and your baby. I can't imagine how scary this must be for you. God knows.

Love you!

Donna said...

Tears. Love you Erin! Praying! I can hear the mountains moving with that prayer!

Wendy said...

I'm also praying for you, Erin. I've been where you are....keep trusting, keep remembering God knows! You're doing well! And ALWAYS remember, no matter what, God is good and loves you and your baby more than you could ever, ever imagine! Praying...

deziray said...

Thanks for sharing