I witnessed it again last night while I was shopping. A mother, with two young daughters was talking with a friend, and the girls started misbehaving. They were arguing a bit about something, getting just a bit rowdy in their sisterly interaction. The mother was instantly embarrassed by their behavior and reacted accordingly. Her expression and countenance told those girls that she was deeply disappointed and ashamed they would act that way in front of her friend. And she had some harsh words with her daughters.
It brought back some memories because I know I’ve been guilty of the same thing.
Here’s the problem when we allow our children’s behavior to embarrass us. Our focus isn’t on them. Our focus is on ourselves. We take their behavior as a personal affront. We become more interested in what others think or on how we feel than being focused on teaching and training our children. We react from hurt, and the ones really being hurt are our own children.
Just think how often God could be embarrassed by our behavior. By the things we say or do. But He’s not. He is patient, and kind, and is not self-seeking. His compassions never fail. He is the Love of the father in the story of the prodigal son.
Learn from my experience. Don’t be embarrassed by your children. Focus on teaching them, instead. They’re still learning…and so are we.
It brought back some memories because I know I’ve been guilty of the same thing.
Here’s the problem when we allow our children’s behavior to embarrass us. Our focus isn’t on them. Our focus is on ourselves. We take their behavior as a personal affront. We become more interested in what others think or on how we feel than being focused on teaching and training our children. We react from hurt, and the ones really being hurt are our own children.
Just think how often God could be embarrassed by our behavior. By the things we say or do. But He’s not. He is patient, and kind, and is not self-seeking. His compassions never fail. He is the Love of the father in the story of the prodigal son.
Learn from my experience. Don’t be embarrassed by your children. Focus on teaching them, instead. They’re still learning…and so are we.
I am pretty sure that God watches me and just shakes his head and says "Oh there goes Theresa again".
ReplyDeleteBut He is a gentle corrector. Which has helped me with my own children.
They don't really embarrass me in public I walk too fast. LOL They just embarass themselves.
ooo, great advice. I usually don't feel embarrased just sliiiightly agitated! :)
ReplyDeleteBut I like getting all red faced and talking at them through clenched teeth. Man...
ReplyDeleteThis is a good post. We were just talking about this the other day at work. The parents there were talking about how they hate taking their kids out to a restaurant because they always seem to start acting up then.
ReplyDeleteOn the other side of it, I always feel sorry for those parent that have kids screaming as they are pulling them down the isles of a store but I never think that they are bad parents because of it, and that is where I think the embarrassment stems.
This is good!!! I needed this one today=)
ReplyDeleteGood point. I have been that mom, and sometimes still am, because of the rep I thought I had to protect. Only to find that I was crushing my boys' spirits instead.
ReplyDeleteI think that woman came to the same restaurant I was at last night...
ReplyDeleteGrowing up, my parents did well. They never disciplined me out of anger or embarrassment. As a teacher, I constantly remind myself to discipline in love, and Proverbs 22:6 is on my desk as well.
Bull's eye, baby.
ReplyDeleteIn addition, I find myself getting embarrassed for myself when my kids don't answer someone's question politely (aren't homeschool kids supposed to be social with adults) or with the correct answer (can you name all of the signers of the Decl of Independence).
Great post! Thanks.
Great post!
ReplyDeleteGreat post. I forget this at times and it is good to be reminded. It is easy to get caught up in the situation selfishly and you think man what does this say about my parenting skills. Thanks for the reminder.
ReplyDelete